MyLifeIsAverage - Life is pretty normal today

Today I was walking past two people, a guy and a girl, and I heard them talking. The guy said something, and the girl said "I have a boyfriend." The guys said "I have two goldfish." The girl looked confused and said "What?" then the guys said "Oh.. I thought we were naming things that don't matter." I walked by again to high five this guy. The girl's face was priceless, especially seeing as its my girlfriend. MLIA.

#667216 Comments: 71 Vote: average 10986meh 658Share

[ - ] snazzyjazzyGood: 4Bad: 51 year, 12 months ago

The girl's face was coverd in lint.

[ - ] snazzyjazzyGood: 7Bad: 21 year, 12 months ago

*covered

[ - ] averagedisplayGood: 21Bad: 71 year, 12 months ago

Today, I read a story on MLIA that was funny, but also complete bull shit. FML.

[ - ] cookie1Good: 20Bad: 11 year, 12 months ago

this is from texts from last night. it might've actually happened but i doubt it was his girlfriend

[ - ] whatthefuckniggaGood: 5Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

yeah i actually just read that post on tfnl

[ - ] attentionhogGood: 3Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

*looks guilty* I just yessed it and it got submitted. I was trying to get a new post.

[ - ] capnspiffyGood: 2Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

*tsks*

[ - ] kiskaGood: 4Bad: 71 year, 12 months ago

She should dump your ass and never talk to your friend again.

[ - ] TheSaneManiacGood: 12Bad: 51 year, 12 months ago

You know what would be great? SHORT AND SWEET SUBMISSIONS.

[ - ] mh1874Good: 10Bad: 61 year, 12 months ago

This is actually pretty funny. But it's not average, so shame on you OP.

[ - ] hamsta_luvaGood: 0Bad: 31 year, 12 months ago

Are you serious? The girl's face was worth millions!

[ - ] xxxin_a_tizzlexxxGood: 5Bad: 11 year, 12 months ago

imagine what he could do with it! he could donate her to a museum!

[ - ] hamsta_luvaGood: 6Bad: 11 year, 12 months ago

Of course! Quick, let's go kidnap her!

[ - ] xxxin_a_tizzlexxxGood: 0Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

but will they take the face while it's still connected to her?? should i bring my butter knife with me??

[ - ] hamsta_luvaGood: 0Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

That's a very good question. Perhaps we should take her whole to the museum, but bring your butter knife just in case.

[ - ] breathecarolinafanGood: 2Bad: 31 year, 12 months ago

How great. MLIA posts with bad pick-up lines. Awesome.

[ - ] iloveyoumarvindustyGood: 7Bad: 21 year, 12 months ago

A high five AND a priceless face? What is this world coming to? Annnnnd they didn't even use the right form of "its". It should be "it's" or "it is."

[ - ] BeeBeeGood: 3Bad: 171 year, 12 months ago

Oh who cares about grammar!

[ - ] bondcatbondGood: 10Bad: 71 year, 12 months ago

gramer is extremly important

[ - ] mmbb9964Good: 5Bad: 11 year, 12 months ago

i hope that was on purpose.

[ - ] bondcatbondGood: 7Bad: 21 year, 12 months ago

..what was on purpoise?

[ - ] KWinchesterGood: 9Bad: 21 year, 12 months ago

*covers eyes* If I do not see it, it does not exist...

[ - ] TheBaddingFairyGood: 3Bad: 11 year, 12 months ago

I-I don't exist?

[ - ] KWinchesterGood: 3Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

*peeks out from behind fingers* I see you! You exist. :D

[ - ] TheBaddingFairyGood: 3Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

Phew. I was getting worried there.

[ - ] iStabberGood: 1Bad: 11 year, 12 months ago

*Stabs KW when she isn't looking*

[ - ] KWinchesterGood: 0Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

Wha'cha stabbin' me with there, boy-o?

[ - ] iStabberGood: 0Bad: 21 year, 12 months ago

Pervert says...

[ - ] KWinchesterGood: 3Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

Toast?

[ - ] iStabberGood: 1Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

Yes.

[ - ] bondcatbondGood: 0Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

i had a dream about you last night. but really, i did. just that you were on here and i was reading your posts...haha...i cant help my subconsciousness

[ - ] KWinchesterGood: 2Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

...Erm...I don't know how to feel about this.

[ - ] bondcatbondGood: 1Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

im sorry. ill try to not do it again

[ - ] KWinchesterGood: 0Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

Nah, you're okay. It's just...odd. Not as bad as a dream you could have had, though. I'm slightly flattered, though.

[ - ] bondcatbondGood: 0Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

='D im glad you accept me for who i am

[ - ] kevinsofttacoGood: 9Bad: 141 year, 12 months ago

So, you're okay with other guys hitting on your girlfriend? Really. WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK IS HAPPENING TO FUCKERS THAT FUCKING COME TO THIS FUCKING WEBSITE. FUCK!!. *fucks* *dies*

[ - ] agirllikeannabelleGood: 2Bad: 101 year, 12 months ago

OP is a fucking fucker without a fuckign average bone in his fuckin' body. Fuck.

[ - ] BeeBeeGood: 7Bad: 131 year, 12 months ago

Jeez, calm down buddy...!

[ - ] KWinchesterGood: 5Bad: 11 year, 12 months ago

*long, low whistle* Whoa...

[ - ] mmbb9964Good: 7Bad: 11 year, 12 months ago

that reminded me of rabies.

[ - ] agirllikeannabelleGood: 3Bad: 11 year, 12 months ago

... Saw it one TV. *singsongs* Some one doesn't have his own funny stories to tell.

[ - ] iloveyoumarvindustyGood: 0Bad: 21 year, 12 months ago

*sings alone, but out of tune*

[ - ] iloveyoumarvindustyGood: 0Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

Awww, shoot. That should be along, not alone. I don't think I'm alone... *looks around*

[ - ] DrLeetsauceGood: 11Bad: 11 year, 12 months ago

You walked by your girlfriend without saying anything? Then only went back to hi-five the guy? Things that don't matter, indeed. Lol.

[ - ] hamsta_luvaGood: 1Bad: 11 year, 12 months ago

Wait. How did the one guy turn into multiple guys?

[ - ] snazzyjazzyGood: 8Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

Plasma jelly.

[ - ] hamsta_luvaGood: 0Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

Why of course.

[ - ] TheSaneManiacGood: 1Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

Wait. In the beginning, there is one guy. In the middle, there are multiple. Then at the end there's one again? FAIL.

[ - ] BeeBeeGood: 0Bad: 21 year, 12 months ago

You are confusing me.

[ - ] Ninjaraybay09Good: 0Bad: 31 year, 12 months ago

way 2 go!

[ - ] killercxntpuntGood: 0Bad: 11 year, 12 months ago

So anyone else hear that apparently Megan Fox is a tranny? I'm not sure I believe that.

[ - ] snazzyjazzyGood: 0Bad: 11 year, 12 months ago

Some kid just texted me and said he wants to "play a game" Should I be worried?

[ - ] ObliviousToTheObviousGood: 0Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

I have never had fish as pets.

[ - ] TheBaddingFairyGood: 1Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

I have. They all died.

[ - ] ObliviousToTheObviousGood: 0Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

How sad. :(

[ - ] BeeBeeGood: 0Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

We got 3 fish at the end of January and 1 is left that will die... *sad face* :(

[ - ] KWinchesterGood: 1Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

One of my brother's fish ate the other fish...

[ - ] omfgzERIKAGood: 4Bad: 21 year, 12 months ago

You stole this from Texts From Last Night. DIE.

[ - ] iamthatgirlGood: 1Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

I've heard this pick-up line before.

[ - ] bondcatbondGood: 3Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

youre gf is a person not an it!

[ - ] livelavaliveGood: 3Bad: 31 year, 12 months ago

ROFLMFAO. LMFAO. LMFAO. LMFAO. LMFAO. LMFAO. WIN.

[ - ] Xmann96Good: 3Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

I read this on TWI(Texts while in intoxicated, which is a copy from "texts from last night"), so I call fake.

[ - ] dobbytheninjaGood: 5Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

Why are you referring to your girlfriend as an "it?"

[ - ] free2smileGood: 3Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

Goldfish are unimportant... I think not!>(

[ - ] sarahm012Good: 1Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

just so everyone knows, this is from texts from last night, so you're not original.

[ - ] MaygenMGood: 0Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

Actually, I heard a comedian say the same joke a couple years ago (except the stupid high-five part), so even texts from last night isn't original

[ - ] sarahm012Good: 0Bad: 01 year, 11 months ago

aw really? damnit tfln i hate fakes

[ - ] ambrawlGood: 1Bad: 11 year, 12 months ago

heard this line millions of times from millions of dumbasses. unoriginal.

[ - ] M_L_I_A_222Good: 0Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

This is complete BS. Saw it on TFLN earlier. Good try.

[ - ] ApeFaceFirstMateGood: 1Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

Even if it isn't original it still made me laugh, which is why I read MLIA. So thank you :)

[ - ] lovelylunacyGood: 1Bad: 01 year, 12 months ago

Dane cook said it, in My Best Friends girl. A movie I'd rather not revisit...

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