crisp

A couple of days ago my mom was surving out ice cream to my little brothers. I came into the kitchen saying, "Mom, can I have some ice cream, please?" My eight year old brother looked at me. "Why, are you gonna eat it?" I reply sarcastically, "No, I'm going to swim in it." His eyes widen and he says seriously, "You better get more ice cream, then." Obviously, he has yet to understand sarcasim. HisLIA

Today, I dueled an employee of Hot Topic for the last Harry Potter snuggie, using the wands on display. Not only did I win, but I got a marriage proposal out of it by the employee I defeated. Life = complete. MLIA.

Today, during a fitness training, the instructors said we were going to do '8-minute abs'. When everybody groaned, they asked 'what, doesn't everybody want rock-hard abs?' My friend next to me immediately responded, 'I already do have rock-hard abs. I just love them so much that I hide them under my fat.' HerLIA

Today I was cooking something in the microwave. It started to pop, so I freaked out and stopped the microwave. Then I realized I was cooking popcorn. MLIA

A few months ago, my friend Lex and I ordered cheesy bread sticks from a pizza place online and put in the special directions box: The password is coffee. When they guy got here, we wouldn't open the door all the way until he told us the password. He did. MLIA

Today, it was Halloween. Instead of handing out candy at my door like a normal person, I sat in the tree outside my front door and threw it at people when they passed by. MLIA

Today I was messing around on Facebook and I was on a friend's page. I looked on the side and I saw that he was related to someone with a profile picture that said, 'Sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of my epicness.' I laughed and clicked on their page, thinking he had a sister or something. It turns out they had a whole bunch of awesome pictures that included one that said, 'When life gives you melons, you're probably dyslexic.', and one that said, 'The world's former hide and seek champion.' with a picture of Osama Bin Laden with a bullet in his head. I looked at the side to see their relation and saw that it was his mom. HerLIA.

Today, I read every page on iwastesomuchtime.com. When I reached pg. 319, I tried to search if there was a page 320 but it said: You've run out... Welcome to the "You Have No Life" Club... MLIA

My mission for today was to write a fake Hogwarts Acceptance Letter and leave it on someone's front door, ring the bell, run, hide and watch the action. The guy who opened the door, found the letter, opened it and read it. He then proceeded to run into his house yelling "TAKE THAT MOM. SCHOOLS DO WANT ME." HisLIA

A few moments ago, I was reading MLIA when I heard music out side. I looked out my window to see a big red truck with only a very masculine man inside as it drove by. His Song Choice? "Now That We're Men," from Spongebob. But it doesn't stop there, he just drove by again playing super hero theme songs......I love my Neighborhood now. M(And His)LIA